Karma, or Conspiracy?

MARSHFIELD—Karma, or conspiracy?

For the 2nd time this season, “Bloody Thursday” rolled around and changed the landscape of the SCUFFLE weekly results, this time costing Marshfield a hard fought victory over rival Fransburg and a spot at the top of the Gold Division.

Some r(E)voLUtionists claim that this is strictly karma for last year’s scoring reversal in the playoffs which cost Fransburg, the highest scoring team in the league that year, a shot at the championship.

However, conspiracy theorists note that Adam never seemed worried in post-game interviews, saying that at least “one [QB hit] each for Bosa and Okafor were listed on ESPN.com” and “maybe it will be updated on Thursday *wink*”. In the facebook announcement for his latest Relegation Watch, article, he noted heavily that he realized that “Thursday’s updates will may have implications for the Gold Division games”. There was also an apparent altercation during the game between Franssen and a referee in which Adam appeared to touch the referee’s back pocket.

As if on cue, Okafor was promptly credited with a QB Hit and an extra pass defended for good measure, giving Fransburg a 134.95-134.10 victory.

“It’s a blow to be sure,” Pirate Coach Jason Enright was quoted as saying, once sober. “Look, I’m not bitter. It’s just that I wasted perhaps the best tecmo whine in the history of tecmo whines. I injured two of his best players and had two touchdowns negated. And for what? Nothing.”

This week, Marshfield welcomes a red-hot but reeling Batavia to town. Some astute fans noted that a last second switch from Tevin Coleman to Devin Funchess cost Marshfield the victory.

“You’re right, and I’ll own that,” Enright was quoted as saying. “The allure of being able to say ‘we’ve got bunches of Funchess’ was too great. I can never seem to make the right decision, so this week I decided to pass the buck and have Hammond select my final flex position. So far, so good.”

© 2017, Jason Enright. All rights reserved.