Divisional Predictions – Part 1

Suffering from the flu and tired of lying on the couch, FFL guru Adam Franssen gives us his take on the upcoming SCUFFLE Immersion season.  Who will win?  Who will lose?  I have no idea, but this is more entertaining than watching TV or taking a nap.  Without further ado…

GAS GIANTS (aka, The NFC West)

This division has produced 2 of the 3 SCUFFLE Immersion champions and, if not for an upset of the Colliders by less than a point at the hands of a fellow Gas Giant, it would be 3 of 3.  This division has owners that routinely field competitive teams that challenge for playoff spots.  Last year, last place Fransburg nearly made all 4 teams playoff participants, but missed out by a few points scored.  Like the NFC West, at least three teams are a legitimate championship threat in 2013.

Division Winner:  The Batavia Colliders (aka SF 49ers)

Batavia boasts a ton of strengths – QB, RB, WR, LB, & CB just to name a few.  If all goes according to plan, they’ll be looking at a second title in three years.  Quite frankly, I see that happening.  However, there are two things that detractors can point to in an effort to bolster their own hopes:   1) Arian Foster’s health.  If a back issue flares, who joins the Muscle Hamster in the starting lineup?  Daniel Thomas?  AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  Seriously, they’d be fucked.  In related news, what I considered the most shocking move of the draft was Batavia selecting WR Tayvon Austin with the 7^th pick in the draft with RB Montee Ball on the board.  Already strong at WR, the pick left them with a frighteningly shallow RB pool.  The other issue is DE.  Batavia paid the position no attention in the offseason and is shows.  What a pack of losers.  Expect JJ Watt to double the output of that entire group alone.  Still this team has to be the odds-on favorite entering the season.

Division Runner-up: The Fransburg (r)EvoLUtion* (aka Seattle Seahawks) 

The main thing going for this team is offensive depth.  They have three Top-24 RBs in Richardson, Bush, and Vereen, and four potential Top-10 WRs in Bryant, Marshall, Fitzgerald, and Nicks.  Throw in Russell Wilson and one of three TE2-types and you’ve got an offense that can win games.  Their weakness is on the defensive end.  Their DT is a rookie (for shame, Franssen) and their SS is about 78 years old.  However, if Greg Hardy, Richard Sherman, and four LB’s can step up, the playoffs are a realistic target for the upcoming season.

Division 2^nd Runner-up:  The Madtown Marauders* (aka St. Louis Rams)

How can I drop the reigning two-time division champ to third this year?  It must be the fever talking; that, or the fact that Coach Giorgianni will be trotting out one of Matt Schaub (QB29) or Mike Vick (QB25) as the opening day starter.  You’re reading my rankings correctly, neither should even by your QB2!  It’s tough to believe that Madtown passed on both Wilson and Peyton Manning to lean on those guys, but it’s fantasy football and anything can happen once the real games begin.  Compounding the issue, as of this writing, Madtown is also still allowing Demaryious Thomas to hold out.  Without him, their starting 6 position players lack a lot of punch.  Leave Gronk on IR for 1-8 weeks and you’ve got a rough early season for the Marauders.  Don’t get me wrong, they’ll win games – once Gronk is healthy, DT & JPP’s holdouts are over and Von Miller is no longer suspended, I expect a huge late-season tear that will put them squarely in the playoff hunt.  Can they dig out of an early hole or will they just ignore this prediction and face-stomp Fransburg in Week 1?

Division 3^rd Runner-up:  The Cleveland Battery (aka Arizona Cardinals)

Welcome to the Bigs, Ben (get it, Big Ben?  That’s gold!).  This division is not for the faint of heart.  Even 2012 Champion Marshfield found themselves in the basement back in 2010 versus this competition.  Aside from the tough intra-divisional games, last year’s Immersion runners-up (Kensington Dragons) was a bit of a mirage, full of players on one year contracts that left new owner Ben Pershey in the uncomfortable position of trying to restock an entire roster.  Financial genius Nick Stukas may have had a plan, but my sources say that he didn’t share those with Coach Pershey.  Thus, Ben is left with only a few strengths: Andrew Luck and the RB corps.  The rest of the team, well….it’s a work in progress.  I expect Cleveland to win a handfule of games this season both in and out of division, but the playoffs appear to be a dim home at the moment.   However, given the events of this offseason, expect the Battery to be a serious thorn in Immersion owners’ sides for years to come.

*Playoff hopeful

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